Step 1: Enter the elevator of a medical building with your dog.

Step 2: Let your dog poop on the carpeted floor of that elevator.

Step 3: Make sure you let your dog do it right next to my mother’s foot.

Step 4: Don’t apologize or warn my nice smelling, sweet mother that she’s about to step in it. She can figure that out herself (and its a good thing she did before she stepped).

Step 5: Clean it up with your little grocery bag, get out of the elevator, and don’t even have the decency to spray a little Febreeze in there before you go, let alone sanitize the floor.

Congrats. I’ll be watching for you, dog lady.