Okay, so I guess I should start out by telling you all that squirrels freak me out. I would never hurt one, but I definitely think they’re disgusting and freaky. And overpopulated everywhere. And probably rabid. And just ew. Back home, they’re actually kind of cute at least, all bushy tailed and light brown.
Here, they’re scary ninjas.
They’re black here! Or at least a really dark mangy brown. And they’re smaller and less fuzzy and I think they’re trying to frighten me to death. Every time I walk to class, a squirrel is in a tree above me practically shaking the dang thing down. Jumping around above my head so that I think someone’s up there about to jump me with a knife or something, when really it’s just a ninja squirrel laughing because I’m stupid.
And they fly. They bloody well fly. And jump and scamper in really strange ways and I know I’m being ridiculous but can’t they walk, not run, down the street? They’re so darty and weird.
I think I’m going to start a ninja-squirrel awareness coalition here to warn people about the dangers of these horrible beasts.