How an Orchestra Made Me Late for Lunch

Today, I got trapped in the student union. By an orchestra.

I just wanted to mail a letter, really.

Maybe I should describe the scene a little. The doors into the student union are on one side of the building, and they open up into a big room. Across the room from the doors are the stairs. I needed to go down the stairs in order to get to the post office. But much to my surprise, an enormous circle of orchestra members was hindering my pursuit of postage. So. I went around them, obviously. I did almost knock a (very small) violinist over in the process, though, so I felt like a bit of an ass from the start.

Oh. Also, I should probably mention that I was carrying a huge shoulder bag and an emergency preparedness kit. I know. My mom ordered it for me a month ago and I just picked it up from the bookstore today (because, you know, always be prepared…except for that month that I wasn’t…). So I’m lugging this huge lunch box full of earthquake aftereffect emergency supplies (which includes a poncho for when the monsoon comes), and it’s bright red and I look stupid anyway, and then I practically break someone’s violin.

Anyway, the real problem came when I tried to get out of the building. They were playing a really dramatic song, probably called Bouffants and Pompadours or something, and I kept looking for a way to the other side of the room, but I couldn’t find one. I would’ve just knocked that violinist down again but she had moved closer to the wall, probably to prevent jerks like me from smashing her instrument and destroying her livelihood. And throughout all this, all I could think was, “Well, at least I have this kit, because I might be here for a while and I might need a glowstick or a tinfoil blanket if it gets cold or dark.” And I tried to go back downstairs and find a way out, but it takes a master’s degree to navigate those hallways and I’m just a freshman and…

Turns out it was totally fine to just walk through the middle of the circle, but that took me 10 minutes to figure out.
Welcome to real life, Cappy, where orchestras trap you inside of buildings.

4 thoughts on “How an Orchestra Made Me Late for Lunch

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  1. “They were playing a really dramatic song, probably called Bouffants and Pompadours or something” — that killed me! It reminded me of a scene from Family Guy (where these snobby guys with severe underbites are laughing), but given that I can’t find it on YouTube, I probably shouldn’t have mentioned it here…

  2. I play violin, and, it’s true… we [orchestras/instrument players] get in the way, and we know it. Just so you know, we try to make it hard for you.
    Love and hugs!
    Best of luck!

    1. The song was quite lovely, and I probably would’ve appreciated it more had I not been desperately looking for a way out :P
      Thanks, same to you!! xo

  3. Sounds surreal! A bunch of classical musicians walked into my local pub (sounds like the beginning of a joke lol) the other day, and bless them, they were all a bit nerdy. I was hoping they’d get drunk, to see if they’d get rowdy but they were quite civilised. Figures.

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