Today, I was a bit of a grumpy camper, so I decided to get a McFlurry. Because really, when you’re sad, what cheers you up more than a questionably-dairy “ice cream” treat injected with death and Reese’s chunks? Nothing, that is the answer.
So I left my house, drove to the closest McDonald’s (which is about 10 minutes away, so please admire my dedication), and pulled up to the drive through.
The girl on the speaker asked me if I wanted a Fancy Burger which was on sale for $30. I said no, and asked for a McFlurry, and she just shouted the total at me. I think she was miffed that I hadn’t ordered a Fancy Burger.
When I drove up to the window, she was just staring at me angrily while speaking on her headset. She stuck her hand out for the money, and as she gave me change, she said, “Have an excellent day.” But it felt more like a threat than anything…like if I dared to have a non-excellent day, she’d find me somehow. Find me and make me eat a Fancy Burger or two.
Anyway, I took my McFlurry and ate it. I ate it good, and you can take that to the bank, buckaroos. Yes siree.
To end the day, and this post, I would like to send you off with this: “The day is done, my sweet, for the lambs have been decapitated.” That was sung by the infamous Kenneth Ellen Parcell from 30 Rock. Because I have also been drowning sorrows in Tina Fey. Thank you, and goodnight. Have an excellent day.