In Between

I graduated from college on Saturday and still can’t quite believe it.

I feel like I’m supposed to be writing an essay right now, or stressing out over an exam, or just generally having a mini heart attack about an assignment. I keep thinking I’m supposed to do something, feel guilty, be worried. But then I realize…it’s over. It’s finally over.

I thought maybe college would never end. Most of my waking life has been spent at school, or doing homework, or going to some school-related event. Now that I’m finished, I feel a little lost. It feels as if I can’t function unless I’m being forced to study.

So here I am, still in my college town for a few more weeks before I move to a city and look for work there. I don’t really know where I’ll work or what I’ll do, but I’m looking forward to being a real human who can leave her job behind at 5 pm and go have a fun life. It’ll be so refreshing to not feel guilty if I actually have fun on the weekends instead of doing homework. And for the next two weeks…I’ll finally relax and take care of myself. I probably need to cleanse my body of all the stress toxins (which probably don’t exist but I swear I feel them in my veinnnnsssss) and the alcohol I consumed after I finished finals…

I’m so happy and lucky to have had such an amazing college education, and I loved my time here and the people I met. I’m just so excited to move on to this exciting part of my life, with even more independence and freedom to actually pursue things I love — I need to get in touch with my creative side again. Getting my B.S. in Psychology was a great choice, and I’ve learned more than I ever expected, but I didn’t get to make things, to paint, to write something other than a research essay. I finally get to put my creativity first.

I’ve missed you all, and thank you for being such wonderful readers as you followed me these last 5 years of my life! Crazy how time flies :) I promise I’ll finally get back to writing more than once every two months.


11 thoughts on “In Between

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  1. First of all, congrats!

    I’m not sure if you’ll experience “the dreams” but well after college I had dreams that I took a course (usually math, which I hate) and forgot to attend even once. Then finals came and I was lost and utterly screwed. I’d be like, “how could I let the WHOLE semester go by and not attend ONE class?”

    I had them for years, until I became a mom. Then the dreams switched to the baby I had and forgot about – which would be left for days in it’s crib until I remembered with horror that I’d neglected the poor thing.

    1. Oh dear God! That makes sense, but is a bit terrifying. I look forward to college stress dreams. On the bright side, I suppose I’ll be able to wake up and say “Aww yeahhh I’m not even in college anymore”

  2. Yay!! Congrats! I am 24 credits shy of my BS in psychology but with a 1 year old I don’t really have time to finish right now.. I am sure you will find a great job and have a fantastic life!!

  3. I understand what you mean by, “It’s finally over.” However, I’d just like to say, congratulations and all BUT…it’s only just beginning for you! I hope it is wonderful and exciting and that you get to do all those things you dream about.

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