Halloween: it’s the most wonderful time of the year. Not to be confused with Christmas, which is the most SnoWonderful time of the year.

It went something like this. Really. I'm so proud of my costume.

I dressed as Ke$ha, which probably makes me a big hypocrite, because I ranted last week about why people shouldn’t be tarts on Halloween. But I promise you this: I did not act like a tart, nor did anyone see my goods this weekend. …So you can rest assured that no one went blind on Halloween night. Anyway, I did the whole “Hi, I’m Ke$ha, I don’t brush my hair and I use so much hairspray there’s a hole in the ozone above my head” deal. Let’s just say there was a lot of eye makeup involved. It was the best time of my life. Who knew ripped fishnets were so freeing? 
I did not, repeat did nottttt, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack. Those shenanigans are unnecessary.

I sooo got my dance on. Really. Someone told me people were watching me dance because I was good, but I’m pretty sure it was more “People are watching you so they don’t get smacked in the face with one of your flailing limbs.”

Tip from the wise (ie me): Don’t grind so much, people. I am ashamed that my generation thinks that dry humping each other constitutes as dancing. I am also horrified that some girls were ACTUALLY bending over and touching their toes. I was just praying for one of them to fall over and break her nose and all her teeth. Heeheehee.
Another tip: Swimsuit tops and short shorts are not costumes. They are what you wear to the beach in July, not out in the end of (COLD) October. 
Aaaand a warning: If you grind on your girl, that’s your deal (though I will warn you that I’m pretty sure you’ll get some sort of STD). But if you grind on your girl and get your butt all up in my space, I WILL  pretend to grind on you when you don’t know it. For five minutes. While everyone watches. I will pretend to grind hard. Because I don’t mind being a creeper.

So there you have it, folks. Don’t take candy from strangers. I think that’s a good moral for this story.


Stah Talk Talk Talkin’ That…

Blaah blah blah.

Trashy? Or classy? Ke$ha switches roles with the jerk guys who terrorize girls at social gatherings.

For those of you who don’t know, Ke$ha is a pop singer who recently became famous with her CD “Animal.” While I can’t figure out if I like her or not (seeing as her songs tend to be about getting trashed and partying, I probably shouldn’t), her song Blah Blah Blah intrigues me.

I’m not sure if her song is meant to sting male musicians whose songs are mainly about getting girls in bed and not actually speaking to them, or if she genuinely just wishes guys would shut up and get down to business. But it makes me think about how many times I’ve met a guy somewhere and he’s not interested in me at all but instead wonders what he can get me to do. Sometimes I just wish they’d stop talk talk talking that blah blah blah and leave me alone if they don’t care about my side of the conversation. Because when I’m not interested, I’m really not interested, but I generally don’t blow the guy off because I want to be polite. Why? I don’t know, I’ve just never wanted to offend.

Ke$ha seems a bit egotistical, kinda crazy, and vulgar, but I think one thing everyone should take away from her songs is be a little more self interested in situations where you just don’t want to deal with someone. Don’t tell them to shut up and get in bed, persay, but if you want to blow someone off if they’re driving you nuts, do it. You have more important things to do.

Going Gaga

The first time I ever heard Lady Gaga was in a car at 2 in the morning driving home from the midnight premier of Bruno (which, incidentally, was the most horrifying movie I have ever been forced to view). I was grumpy. I was tired. Some crazy lady on the radio was yelling “Boys Boys Boys!” and talking about eggs. It was Gaga.
I can’t remember where I was when I heard Lady Gaga for the second time. I’m pretty sure I can credit my friend Cameron for turning me on to her. Where I was and what I was doing is completely irrelevant. I’m now completely hooked.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t go around talking about people’s disco sticks. I don’t dance in high heels and a thong. I listen to Peter, Paul, and Mary, for goodness sake. But I feel this empowerment when I listen to Lady Gaga’s songs that I can’t get many other places. I feel good to be a woman. I understand that other people hate guys sometimes too. I dance like mad to every single song (except, ironically, Just Dance, which was overplayed and I cannot stand hearing anymore). And I understand that its ok to be who I am, even if that’s a super crazy girl. I feel like I’m covered in sequins when I hear her songs. I think that’s just fine.

In an interview with Ellen DeGeneres, Lady Gaga explained that she felt like a freak in high school and that her purpose was to make her young fans feel like they could let their inner freaks out.

 High school is a really weird place. Everyone thinks they know the right way to live life when really nobody actually understands what life is. So when everyone else is telling you who to be and why, its good to have a symbol of why you can tell them to shut up. Lady Gaga is a talented woman who got her fame by being who she is.
And you’ve got to admit, her albums are great to listen to while putting on makeup.